Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
