he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
thus making me awesome and them whores
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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