You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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