Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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