Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
