I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
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