i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
