Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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