Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
