he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
