David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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