Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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