butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
