I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize