Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
