with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Randomize
