Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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