And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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