How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
