Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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