How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
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So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
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