I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize