I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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