Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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