I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
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