Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize
