Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
