i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
