Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
