just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
