I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
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