it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
