I'm drive I can fine osifer
Need sex. Gaining weight.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
