I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
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