I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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