our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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