she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
