If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
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