I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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