I like to think it a success when the cops are called
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
