11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Randomize
