no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
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She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
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I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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