Non-Jews are for practice
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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