marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Randomize
