Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize