thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Randomize
