On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
