me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
