I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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