The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
the raccoons are back...
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