my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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