You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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